Hell explained by a chemistry student

[NeverMore]

.
(Ok, this one isn't totally on-topic and it's a bit technical but if you know
anything about chemistry it's totally worth it. Then again, if you've studied
chemistry, you've probably read it before.)


The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that
the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of
course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
===========

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at
which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul
gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how
many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist
in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion,
you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and
since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that
all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect
the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the
rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in
order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the
volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take
into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two
must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already
frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over,
it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct
......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being
which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."


THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+

[Andybev01]

HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!!!

I love nerd humor

[Pumpkin_Man]

I have a buddy who's a chemistry professor at the college where I work. I hope you don't mind me e-mailing this to him.

Mike

[NeverMore]

I have a buddy who's a chemistry professor at the college where I work. I hope you don't mind me e-mailing this to him.

Mike

Sure, go ahead. It's all over the net. It's pretty old, judging by his profession he's probably read it before.

[adrian]

I LOVE the new Avatar Nevermore it suites you better

[NeverMore]

I LOVE the new Avatar Nevermore it suites you better

I figured it'll help people understand my nym better also.

[adrian]

cool i love the image

[Ghoul of the Graves]

Haha, great joke