Some epitaphs

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NeverMore
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Some epitaphs

Post by NeverMore » Sun Sep 06, 2009 12:27 am

.
Browsing Old Cemeteries

A truly Happy Person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.


=============================

Harry Edsel Smith of Albany, New York :

Born 1903--Died 1942.

Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the

car was on the way down. It was.


=============================

In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:

Here lies an Atheist, all dressed up

and no place to go.


=============================

On the grave of Ezekial Aikle in

East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia :

Here lies Ezekial Aikle, Age 102. Only The

Good Die Young.


=============================

In a London, England cemetery:

Here lies Ann Mann, Who lived an old maid

but died an old Mann. Dec. 8, 1767


=============================

In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:

Anna Wallace

The children of Israel wanted bread, And

the Lord sent them manna. Clark Wallace

wanted a wife, And the Devil sent him Anna.


===============================

In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:

Here lies Johnny Yeast... Pardon him

for not rising.


===============================

In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.

Stepped on the gas instead of the brake.


==============================

In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:

Here lays The Kid.

We planted him raw.

He was quick on the trigger

But slow on the draw.


================================

A lawyer's epitaph in England:

Sir John Strange.

Here lies an honest lawyer,

and that is Strange.


=================================

John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne,

England, cemetery:

Reader, if cash thou art in want of any,

Dig 6 feet deep and thou wilt find a Penny.


==================================

In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:

On the 22nd of June, Jonathan Fiddle went

out of tune.


==================================

Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls ,

Vermont:

Here lies the body of our Anna,

Done to death by a banana.

It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,

But the skin of the thing that made her go.


==================================

On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket ,

Massachusetts:

Under the sod and under the trees,

Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.

He is not here, there's only the pod.

Pease shelled out and went to God.


==================================

In a cemetery in England:

Remember man, as you walk by,

As you are now, so once was I

As I am now, so shall you be.

Remember this and follow me.

To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:

To follow you I'll not consent.

Until I know which way you went.




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adrian
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Re: Some epitaphs

Post by adrian » Sun Sep 06, 2009 1:15 pm

Oh my God thank you for posting!! these are so funny
Last night 'twas witching Hallowe'en
Dearest; an apple russet- brown
I pared, and thrice above my crown
Whirled the long skin; they watched in keen;
I flung it far; they laughed and cried me shame
Dearest, there lay the letter of your name!

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